Stay With Me
by letscheertothis
Summary: In this AU, we meet our dear friend Levi dealing with some pretty tough inner battles. He thinks he found the one, until he bumps into someone unexpected and his whole world and life style is changed. He begins to learn new things about himself that he never even thought about or knew. So, who is this new person of interest and what will Levi do? Ask them to stay or to go?
1. Loss

Chapter One: Loss

In a few hours, she'll be six feet in the ground. In a few days, mention of her death will still sting, in a few weeks, her name will be hushed whispers, in a few months, she'll have been grieved for, in a year, she'll be forgotten. Levi didn't want any of that. He told himself what he'd go through while all this happened around him, too numb to be involved. However the information refused to plant into his brain, simply because he didn't want to face the reality of it all. He'd have to see her in a coffin, being lowered to the ground, having others tell him how sorry they were. Well, fuck them...he didn't want them to feel sorry. He wanted them to feel his pain, his ache. Then and only then could they be "sorry".

"Levi? It's...it's time."

His best friend's deep voice had pulled the male from his inner thoughts and he glanced up. There, sticking through the door was Erwin Smith. The one man Levi had come to call a friend, best at that. He could see the sympathy there in his eyes, the pity he had for him. Again, Levi didn't want that, especially from his best friend. He simply nodded his head slowly, and watched Erwin nod back, retreating from the door. A sigh escaped from his lips and he finished looping his tie around his neck. Usually when he dressed up, he'd choose a cravat. However, he knew her favorite was when he wore a tie, and so he would.

The funeral was long. Maybe because he felt uncomfortable in his own skin or because it was his fiance he was watching be mourned over and placed six feet under. Whichever it was, made the service seem like an eternal hell. Not everyone knew of their recent engagement, but those who did couldn't seem to bring it upon themselves to look Levi in the eyes. Not once did Levi shed a tear, no matter how much blubbering was going on around him, his eyes were dry. He thought the visitation was bad, but the funeral was worse. Longer, and even more people to cry and pretend like the girl had impacted their life and that her death would alter it in the slightest. Levi didn't give a eulogy, he declined her father's offer. The man understood and instead went up himself. The fathers words were sweet, full of love. To Levi's dismay, he addressed to everyone that his daughter had, had plans to marry him. Then, by his own words it seemed, he crumbled, reminded of what could have been. He cried, and someone led him away. It was sad, don't get Levi wrong, he was depressed as shit. He just didn't see the point of making it so public. At the end, Erwin placed his firm hand on his shoulder. Levi took the cue to follow behind the casket as it left the building, ready to be taken to the burial site.

The grave was just a few minutes from his apartment, or the apartment the two were to share, but never ended up getting there. The whole time the burial took place, Levi just pictured the time they had spent in their relationship All the things they had done in their short time together. The entirety of their love, now...gone. Visualizing all the things in his apartment that would taunt him when he returned to it. Her sweatshirt, her flip flops, eyeliner; all things that he'd want to remove but felt guilty just thinking about doing so. At some point, he stopped thinking all together and his body was just on autopilot. He'd been so out of it that when he finally snapped back into it, he was waking up. However, it was not in his room, it was in hers. He swallowed the dry lump in his throat and climbed out of the bed, and finally left the room. Levi found his way downstairs where many voices flooded his still tired and cloudy head. As he moved from the steps and through the crowded room of people dressed in black (who were giving him the obvious look over), he knew he shouldn't have left the room. After he'd turned a corner to head to a different room, he came to face a familiar man. A friend of his fiance maybe? He'd met him before, Hannes was his name?

The other male stopped him by reaching his arm out and offering his hand to shake. He nodded his head. "Levi." He sighed. "I'm so, so, sorry…"

Levi was confused, why was he saying sorry. What was with all the people giving him an odd look. He sighed and went to open his mouth to ask the man what he was going on about. Erwin was the one to stop him. He came over, wrapped his arm around the skinny males shoulders trying to move him back towards the stairs.

He nodded to the Hannes guy. "Thanks so much Hannes, really, your condolences are appreciated." Erwin kept directing Levi towards the stairs. Once out of earshot, Erwin mumbled slowly to Levi. "You should go back upstairs, get some more rest, you really need it." He tried to persuade, but Levi wasn't taking the bait.

He just shook his head. "What's going on? Where is she? Why are all these people in here?" With his voice loud, he began to draw even more attention from people around them, trying to get a taste of just how damaged he really was.

Erwin's brow furrowed and knew immediately that his best friend was in denial. "Levi?" He questioned. "Remember, we came over to Mr. Rall's house after the funeral. These people are enjoying some food and reminiscing about her. Before anyone showed up, we let you take a nap."

As his best friend explained, reality came back and bit Levi in the ass. His head wasn't groggy from just waking up, but because he was flooded with memories of that night. He put his hand on his forehead and he took deep sharp breaths. He leaned into Erwin. "I...I," He gasped. "I don't think I can breath."

The raven haired male turned sharply to hurry back to the stairs and up them to get away from all the faces and the whispers and mostly reality. However, as he turned to go into the other room, one of the waiters that had been walking around with trays collided right into him. The cheap tray clattered to the floor between both males feet, the drinks however had followed the momentum and flung all over Levi. Some splattered into his face, the others down the front of his black button down. He gasped as the cold drinks hit, as well as the at the impact.

"I, oh god...I'm so sorry. I wasn't…I didn't think." The brunette waiter had bent down to scrounge up all that had fallen, as if somehow it would reverse what had been done.

Levi's dull eyes just followed him as he raised back up slowly, biting at his lip nervously, as if he'd get yelled at. He wasn't mad, nor was he all that happy. He just wanted out of the social eye. He took a deep breath and shook his head.

"Look, it's fine kid. Think you could find some towels though?" He glanced down at his now damp clothes.

It took the kid a moment to realize he wasn't going to be yelled at. He blinked and then a stupid smile appeared on his face. "I ca-"

However, an arm cut him off as a towel was hanging in front of Levi's face, a girl extending it out to him.

"Here you go Mr. Rivaille." She nodded her head as Levi took the towel in his hands. "So sorry, my brother got your shirt wet. Mr. Rall, said that he'd find a shirt that he'd lend you to get out of this wet one. In the meantime here is a towel to dry as much as you can. Again, I apologize for Eren's mistake."

Levi eyed the girl in a white shirt and red scarf. Who was she and how had she just appeared to save this kids ass? He just nodded. "Thank you…"

"Mikasa." She piped in.

"Mikasa…" He nodded at the two, as he walked past, patting the towel on his face. "Eren."

Then as he continued to walk through the crowd of now silent people, he heard the Eren kid whisper behind him.

"Hey, wait, _Rivaille_? Oh crap, that's Petra's _fiance_!"

His whisper wasn't all that concealed with the rest of the room so quiet. And just before he made it to the top of the stairs, the slap was unmistakable.

"...wait, does this still mean I get pai- ow! what was that for!"


	2. Muse

Chapter Two: Muse

* * *

Two weeks. Two weeks locked away in his own room, in his apartment. No visitors or friends, not that he had any anyways. However, a lot of people had started to slip sympathy notes under the door, or leave casserole or plates of sweets outside his door. Things he found when he bothered to open the door to tape his rent money on it or grab the mail. Today he'd ventured out into the living room to sit on the couch and eat out of a pint sized container of ice cream. The male, usually a freak about cleaning and tidiness, just didn't have the motivation and so his place was cluttered with things placed on the floor and randomly about. He clicked on the tv and lazily scanned the channels. Giving up in his search for anything decent, he left it on the channel that played all the help shows, like Maury, Jerry Springer and things of the sort. Bickering of couples filled the space around and it almost made him feel whole. It was nice to know that other couples were in pain. As the shows played, Levi sat content with his ice cream in his lap. However, when it got the end of the show (and his pint), did Levi drop his spoon into the empty container. His normally dull eyes scanned over the room and he sighed deeply. God had he let things get that messy around here? Before he could push the sticky empty carton away from him, a knock on the door and a noise was heard from his door. After the sound of keys jangling, Erwin's head stuck into the apartment. His blond hair was seen first and then as his blue eyes scanned the room he spotted Levi. The tall male let out a sigh at the sight of his best friend.

Levi was ready to defend himself. "Who the _hell_ said you could just _walk_ in here?"

Erwin just held up a lanyard of keys. "The idiot that gave me the key to his apartment."

Slumping back down in defeat Levi pursed his lips. "Shit."

Erwin stepped fully into the door and shut it with the back of his foot. He glanced around and then back at Levi. He nodded to the ice cream. "Really?" He raised his brow.

Furrowing his brow, Levi shook his head, setting the container on the table in front of him, "Shut up."

Erwin just shook his head and entered the room slowly, a backpack hanging from one of his toned arms. Levi didn't keep his eyes on him, but he didn't need to look at him to know where he was going to go. As he heard the deep sigh, Levi just wrapped his blanket tighter around himself.

"Don't." He shook his head. "Don't you _dare_ turn this into some sappy book or stereotypical romantic comedy movie scene Erwin Smith. I don't want to hear your probably overly practiced lines of how I should "get out" and "go do something fun" or "She wouldn't want to see you like this' _crap_. " He took a deep breath. "You don't have a _damn_ clue what she'd want and to be honest, I don't want to hear it." He stood up, his blanket staying on his shoulders. "I was just about to get up a clean okay? I realize what I'm doing, but that's how _I_ deal with this sort of thing, okay?" He bent over the table in front of him, reaching for the glasses and dishes strewn across it. He stuck them in the crook of his elbow and when he brushed past Erwin to get to the sink he just looked down at the floor. The dishes clattered in the sink and then Erwin's deep voice broke through the silence.

"I wasn't going to go there Levi..."

"Good." Levi huffed.

Then silence fell over the two once more as Levi began to run water over the dishes in the sink. He glanced up and realize that Erwin had started to pick up scattered clothes on the floor. A few things of Levi's, hoodies, shoes, the outfit he'd worn to the funeral. But what set Levi off and drop the glass in his hand was when Erwin scooped up a small purple blouse. Her blouse.

"_Erwin fucking Smith, put that shit_ _down_!" He yelled as the wet glass he'd let slip shattered in the sink basin.

Erwin's eyes were big as his head snapped towards Levi. The taller male just nodded and slowly set the pile on the floor. Standing back up with his hands out in front of him, as if Levi was holding a gun to the dude. Erwin nodded his head slowly.

"Okay, okay...I won't help." A small smirk formed on his lips. "I know how you are about your things, you clean freak."

Levi understood that the word was meant to be lighthearted and taken as a joke, just to get him to lighten up, smile even. But the male just shook his head. "I, I don't want to deal with the clothes yet, I'm working on dishes." He nodded to the living room. "If you want to help, bring them over here."

Erwin nodded. "Gotchya'. I can do that."

Normally, Levi would have been laughing at the way Erwin was trying so hard. He knew his best friend was always wanting to be helpful in some way, and this was a whole new territory, for both of them. They had never had to console one another over death. Now, break ups, crazy ex's and everything else two twenty some year old men put up with was textbook, but a death of a fiance was a parallel universe and neither star knew if they should shine or not, in fear of burning up. Levi just pulled on some rubber gloves to take care of the shattered pieces of glass in the sink. He sighed and set them on a small towel to be thrown away. After tossing the glass, Levi returned to the sink to begin washing out a bowl. As Erwin returned to the sink, the two moved at the same time and he ended up bumping into Levi's hip. The smaller male almost lost his balance.

"Jeez, Erwin." Levi half rolled his eyes. "Do you _want_ me to break more dishes?"

Erwin just clicked his tongue. "Oh man, you got me. My main goal was to bring you here to smash all the dishes in your house." He chuckled and then shrugged, beginning to join in on cleaning the dishes around them. Levi said nothing. "But did you know its known that breaking dishes is like a great way to relieve tension or just like emotions…?"

When it came to Erwin Smith, he could either be extremely intelligent and say all the right things or a complete dense, blonde, pretty boy and all around idiot. Levi had to hold back a dry laugh. He just dried off the dish Erwin had handed him. Erwin kept talking.

"So, like besides cleaning, we should go get lunch. Unless you've already eaten. With all these dishes I can't tell if it was today or last week." He joked.

"Heh,"

Was all that escaped Levi's lips. He knew he couldn't completely shut out his best friend. He just wouldn't let Levi get away with it. He'd be thankful for that, he knew…later, much later. So finally he spoke up.

"Okay, but I don't want to go out. I'm not in the mood to be social."

Erwin shrugged as he watched Levi stack the last clean dish, and then began to drain the water in the sink.

"Oh, well then we can eat here, keep cleaning if you'd like." He offered a smile. "In fact, I'll make it for you."

He pushed off the counter and before Levi could raise his voice to stop him, Erwin opened the fridge door.

"Oh." His face fell. "You don't think I can get away with making anything with Ketchup and butter do you?"

Levi made a face and folded his arms over his chest. "Not really…unless you want to make me throw up."

Erwin is quiet for a moment. "Well then, why don't we get a pizza, keep cleaning..."

"Whatever..."

A whole pizza and some odd hours later, the two males end up sitting down on the couch, exhausted.

"I think we cleaned everything, and then went back and cleaned it again." Erwin stated.

Levi only nodded his head. "You did. I made you, I always clean things twice." He male was playing with his hands in his lap, picking at his cuticles.

Erwin's mouth opened but before he could say anything a shrill voice came from after the door bursting open.

"Aunt Hanji is home!" The odd female sang.

Levi's head snapped up and he glared at Erwin. He mouthed the words. "_You didn't_…"

Erwin bit his bottom lip, knowing he was caught. "I'm sorry, I only gave her a spare key because I thought she'd get you out of your place." He whispered quickly and stood up. "We're in here Zoe!"

Levi's dull eyes followed the tall male walking over to the door where he greeted Hanji with a tight hug. If only Levi's stare could kill…

"Levi-wevi." Hanji squealed when she let go of Erwin. Probably the only girl who could shove Erwin Smith away, and not be in trouble or find out you couldn't move the towering six foot male. The brunette jumped over the back of the couch and plopped down next to Levi and her arms were instantly around his next hugging him.

"H, Ha.." Levi struggled in the girls grasp, and spitting out the girls hair that fell into his mouth.

Erwin cleared his throat. "Zoe, come on now. Play nice." He chuckled. "You can't rough house Princess like that."

Hanji just laughed and released the boy from the hold she had him in and Levi just raised his hand to massage his neck.

"I'm not a princess." He rolled his eyes, almost childishly.

Hanji just cackled. "Right!" She patted his arm, what was supposed to be a friendly shove actually made Levi believe his shoulder would pop off.

"Jesus Hanj." He moved his hand from his neck to his arm. "Stop touching me."

And before Hanji could realize that Levi had insulted her like always, Erwin spoke up. Saving Levi's sarcastic ass, smoothly as usual.

"Zoe, I thought you said you had a date." Erwin sat across from the two on a chair. His broad shoulders rose and fell. "What happened?"

"She probably thought you were a dude." Levi murmured.

Hanji didn't even register Levi's snarky comment and began to tell her story. "Oh no, we weren't on the date. However, she said she doesn't go for girls like me." The female sighed. "Maybe I should go back to males." Her head turned to Levi.

Levi flinched at the jab to the rib.

"How about you Levi? Wanna be my boyfriend?" She laughed. "You can teach me how to like it the other way." The girls head tilted back as she enjoyed her own joke.

Erwin, in all his flustered glory, tried to repair what Hanji said. Levi figured it was because he was afraid talk of relationships would break him or set him off? But no, the raven haired male just glared at the girl and shook his head.

"Shut up shitty glasses."

Hanji just let a goofy grin spread across her lips. "Love you too baby." T

he girl then leaned back on the couch, folding her arms behind her head and raising her feet to rest on the small coffee table. It irked Levi. He just cleaned the stupid thing and the stupid girl was so carelessly dirtying. She obliviously went on.

"But no, we hit it off. She did say that girls weren't full time for her - so I'm glad she warned me." She sighed. "So for now we'll just be...persons of interest...who flirt nonstop and its pretty interesting. I've never had something like this before, so it'll be fun to see how it plays out."

Erwin was contently listening like he always did. He cared about every word a person said, or at least he acted like he did, Levi thought. His big head nodded. "That's great Zoe. Does she know you…"

"That I'm a transgender?" Hanji laughed. "Come on Smith, you can say it...trans...gen...der." She teased and shrugged. "Yeah, after she was honest with me, I was honest with her. And to be honest now, I only told her to higher my chances of her sticking around. Like, I'm a girl now but baby I can be your man soon…" Hanji nodded her head slowly. "Yeah, yeah am I right?"

Erwin just shook his head with a chuckle and Levi rolled his eyes. The three then let silence take them over and Levi could feel the elephant in the room. Hell, how could you miss it? Her clothes were still on the floor, her pictures scattered across the book shelves - the only things Levi couldn't bring himself to clean up.

Hanji was the first to speak up, which surprised Levi. "So, we're totally heading out tonight right?"

"Heading out?" Levi questioned.

"Uh duh princess. It's Friday, we go to the club, I actually get to be on stage tonight. Some of the queens want to perform a song with me. It's only been something I've been practicing non-stop for weeks now. Didn't I tell you?"

At her question, the male was stuck silent. She had told him, she'd called him screeching on the phone that they finally asked her to perform in drag on stage. He had forgotten all about it, he'd forgotten a lot of things. How was it already Friday? As Levi's head swarmed with questions, he didn't even hear Erwin in time to object.

"Of course Hanji, why do you think I was over here? I was trying to get princess here to get in his ballgown."

And instead of telling them both to get the hell out. Levi just shook his head.

"I'm not a fucking princess."


End file.
